Aaaahhh!! I'm going back to my old ways!

About 6 posts ago, I told myself and to the people of the world that I would change and be a 'confident', 'open' and a more 'positive' person. It lasted well for about 2 weeks but after that it started to fade away and something made me realize today that I'm no longer that new person I thought I had become.

I'm once again slightly negative, I tried being open and confident but its just not working for me! Its like I'm trying too hard and just becoming exhausted by the end of it and accomplishing only one fifth of what I had gone out to achieve. I TRY, okay, I really do. I even tried using The Secret and sometimes when that small thing I want does happen, my mind brushes it off by saying, "Oh, its just a coincidence." I'm really exhausted.

Its not like I'm complaining and not doing anything about it. I am. Maybe I'm just not cut out for being all those things I tried to become. Thank you, to all those who tried lecturing/advising me on how to become all those things. It did work... for a while.

And now I'm too exhausted to go on.

“I don't wish to be everything to everyone, but I would like to be something to someone.”
- Javan